Managing Sundown Syndrome, pt 3

So, it’s 6 p.m., and despite your best efforts, agitation in your elderly parent is building. What now? How do you manage a Sundowning episode?

First, check your own stress level. The elder with dementia can pick up on anxiety like a radio signal. If you’re tense, they can get tense. Take a breath. Soften your voice. Approach calmly. Try to relax normally.

Could they need something basic? Sundowning sometimes resolves completely when the caregiver realizes the person just needed to use the bathroom or was hungry. Sometimes that aggressive behavior is actually them trying to communicate pain they can’t articulate.

Don’t argue with them. If your mom insists that she needs to pick up the kids from school (kids who are now in their 30s), arguing won’t help. Try, “The kids are fine; they’re safe. Let’s have some tea together.” Redirect rather than correct. If they need to pace, let them — as long as they’re safe. Walking off that anxious energy often helps more than trying to force them to sit still.

Turn off the TV news, lower the music volume. Dim harsh overhead lights, but don’t make it dark. Evening news, with its dramatic music and stressful content, can trigger agitation. Try switching to nature documentaries or calming programs instead.

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